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    Home > Funny Greeting Cards

    Funny Greeting Cards - Classic Quotes With Funny Photos

    Check out are these very funny quote cards - great quotes with hilarious pictures - perfect for birthday, or any occasion - from Borealis Press and QuoteArts.com. Great combinations of funny quotations and entertaining pictures. We dare you to try not to laugh.



    Immoral Illegal Or Fattening - Card
    "All the things I really like to do are either immoral, illegal, or fattening." ~ Alexander Woollcott
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    Hold Tight And Pretend It's A Plan - Funny Greeting Card
    "Hold tight and pretend it's a plan." ~ Steven Moffat
    Reg. Price: $3.50
    Sale Price: $2.45
    Lose Your Mind - Card
    "They tell me that you'll lose your mind when you grow older. What they don't tell you is that you won't miss it very much." ~ Malcolm Cowley
    Reg. Price: $3.50
    Sale Price: $2.45
    Life Is A Daring Adventure - Card
    "Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing."
    Reg. Price: $3.50
    Sale Price: $2.45
    Start With A Smile - Card
    "Start every day with a smile, and get it over with."
    Reg. Price: $3.50
    Sale Price: $2.45
    I Always Wanted To Be Somebody - Funny Greeting Card
    "I always wanted to be somebody, but I realize I should have been more specific." Lily Tomlin
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    Only Young Once - Card
    "You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely."
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    Ever Stop To Think  - Greeting Card
    "Did you ever stop to think, and then forget to start again?"
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    You Only Live Once - Greeting Card
    "You only live once, but if you work it right, once is enough."
    Reg. Price: $3.50
    Sale Price: $2.45
    Everyone Thinks They Have The Best Dog - All Occasion Card
    "Everyone thinks they have the best dog, and none of them are wrong." ~ W.R. Purche
    Reg. Price: $3.50
    Sale Price: $2.45
    If Cats Could Talk - Greeting Card
    "If cats could talk, they wouldn't." ~ Nan Porter
    Reg. Price: $3.50
    Sale Price: $2.45
    My Life To Live Again - Card
    "If I had my life to live again, I would make the same mistakes, only sooner." ~ Tallulah Bankhead
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    Education Is A Wonderful Thing - Greeting Card
    "Education is a wonderful thing. If you couldn't sign your name you'd have to pay cash." ~ Rita Mae Brown
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    Maturity Is A Phase - Greeting Card
    "Maturity is a phase. Adolescence is forever."
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    Women Don't Retire - Greeting Card
    "Women don't retire, they just keep on cooking."
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    Life Is One Fool Thing - Greeting Card
    "Life is one fool thing after another, whereas love is two fool things after each other." ~ Oscar Wilde
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    Dance First Think Later - Greeting Card
    "Dance first. Think later. It's the natural order." ~ Samuel Beckett
    Reg. Price: $3.50
    Sale Price: $2.45
    Too Much Of A Good Thing - Greeting Card
    "Too much of a good thing can be wonderful." ~Mae West
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    Inside Every Older Lady - Greeting Card
    "Inside every older lady is a young woman wondering what the hell happened." ~Unknown
    Reg. Price: $3.50
    Sale Price: $2.45
    Don't Dwell On Reality - Greeting Card
    "Don't dwell on reality. It will only keep you from greatness." ~ Rev. Randall R. McBride, Jr.
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    Remember Misers - Greeting Card
    "Remember MISERS? They could SAVE money!"
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    Supply Of Good Women - Greeting Card
    "The supply of good women far exceeds that of men who deserve them." ~ Robert Graves
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    I Used To Be Snow White - Greeting Card
    "I used to be Snow White, but then I drifted." ~ Mae West
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    The Greatest Pleasure - Greeting Card
    "The greatest pleasure in life is doing what other people say you cannot do." ~ Walter Bagehot
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    Two Kinds of Men  - Greeting Card
    "I only like two kinds of men, domestic and imported" ~ Mae West
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    Never Wanted To Be A Millionaire  - Greeting Card
    "I never wanted to be a millionaire, just to lve like one." ~ Walter Hagen
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    People Our Parents Warned Us About  - Greeting Card
    "We have become the kind of people our parents warned us about." ~ Augustus John
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    I Don't Want Realistic  - Borealis Press Greeting Card
    "I don't want realistic! I want magic!" ~ Tennessee Williams
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    I Intend To Remain Young Indefinitely - Borealis Press Greeting Card
    "I intend to remain young indefinitely." ~ Mary Pickford
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    Women Are Like Tea Bags - Borealis Press Greeting Card
    "Women are like tea bags. We don't know our strength until we are in hot water." ~ Eleanor Roosevelt
    Reg. Price: $3.50
    Sale Price: $2.45
    Wise Enough To Never Grow Up - Greeting Card
    "I was wise enough to never grow up, while fooling other people into believing that I had." ~ Margaret Mead
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    Nice Knowing Someone Like You - Borealis Press Greeting Card
    "It's nice knowing someone like you. Someone to lean on, someone to count on, someone to tell on." ~ Unknown
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    Only One Thing Wrong With The Younger Generation - Borealis Press Greeting Card
    "There is only one thing wrong with the younger generation: some of us don't belong to it anymore." ~Bernard Baruch
    Reg. Price: $3.50
    Sale Price: $2.45
    Boys Will Be Boys - Borealis Press Greeting Card
    "Boys will be boys, and so will a lot of middle-aged men." ~ Frank McKinney Hubbard
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    Man Smart, Woman Smarter - Borealis Press Greeting Card
    "Man smart. Woman smarter." ~ Norman Span
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    Every Day I Look At The Richest People - Borealis Press Greeting Card
    "Every day I look through the list of the richest people. If I'm not there, I get up and go to work." ~ Robert Orben
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    When You're Middle-Aged - Funny Greeting Card
    "When you're middle-aged, the mischief is mainly in your head." ~ David Williams
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    A Happy Childhood Is The Worst Preparation - Funny Greeting Card
    "A happy childhood is the worst preparation for life." ~ Kinky Friedman
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    Any Idiot Can Face A Crisis - Funny Greeting Card
    "Any idiot can face a crisis. It's day-to-day living that wears you out." ~ Anton Chekhov
    Reg. Price: $3.50
    Sale Price: $2.45
    If A Dog's Prayers Were Answered - Funny Greeting Card
    "If a dog's prayers were answered, bones would fall from the sky." ~ Old proverb
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    If They Can Send One Man To The Moon - Funny Greeting Card
    "If they can send one man to the moon, why can't they send them all?" ~ Unknown
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    Anyone Can Be Cool - Quotable Card
    "Anyone can be cool, but awesome takes practice." ~ Lorraine Peterson
    Reg. Price: $3.50
    Sale Price: $2.45
    A Girl Knows Her Limits - Funny Greeting Card
    "A girl knows her limits, but a wise girl knows she has none." ~ Norma Jean Mortenson (Marilyn Monroe)
    Reg. Price: $3.50
    Sale Price: $2.45
    The Threat of A Woman - Funny Card
    "It is rare to see, in a little boy, the promise of a man, but in a little girl one can almost always see the threat of a woman." ~ Alexandre Dumas
    Reg. Price: $3.50
    Sale Price: $2.45
    When A Dog Is Not Preferable To A Man - Funny Greeting Card
    "There are times when a dog is not preferable to a man." ~ Mark Montague
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    Laugh And The World Laughs With You - Funny Greeting Card
    "Laugh, and the world laughs with you." ~ Ella Wheeler Wilcox
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    Happiness Does Not Notice The Passing Of Time - Funny Greeting Card
    "Happiness does not notice the passing of time." ~ Chinese proverb
    Reg. Price: $3.50
    Sale Price: $2.45
    To Live Is So Startling - Funny Greeting Card
    "To live is so startling that it leaves little time for anything else." ~ Emily Dickinson
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    Man Who Says His Wife Can't Take A Joke - Funny Greeting Card
    "The man who says his wife can't take a joke forgets that she took him." ~ Oscar Wilde
    Reg. Price: $3.50
    Sale Price: $2.45
    If I Look Confused  -  Funny All Occasion Card
    "If I look confused, it's because I'm thinking." ~ Samuel Goldwyn
    Reg. Price: $2.95
    Sale Price: $2.07
    People Who Make Me Laugh  -  Funny All Occasion Card
    "I love people who make me laugh." ~ Audrey Hepburn
    Reg. Price: $3.50
    Sale Price: $2.45
    No I Won't Grow Up  -  Funny All Occasion Card
    "No. I won't grow up." ~ J.M. Barrie
    Reg. Price: $3.50
    Sale Price: $2.45
    My Cup Runneth Over -  All Occasion Card
    "My cup runneth over." ~ the Bible, Psalm 23
    Reg. Price: $3.50
    Sale Price: $2.45
    You Can Learn Many Things From Children -  All Occasion Card
    "You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance." ~ Franklin P. Jones
    Reg. Price: $3.50
    Sale Price: $2.45
    Knitting Soothes The Troubled Spirit -  All Occasion Card
    "Properly practiced, knitting soothes the troubled spirit, and it doesn't hurt the untroubled spirit either." ~ Elizabeth Zimmerman
    Reg. Price: $3.50
    Sale Price: $2.45
    There Are Shortcuts To Happiness -  All Occasion Card
    "There are shortcuts to happiness, and dancing is one of them." ~ Vicki Baum
    Reg. Price: $3.50
    Sale Price: $2.45
    You Are The High In My Noon - Quotable Card
    "You are the HIGH in my NOON, the FLAP in my JACK..." ~ H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
    Reg. Price: $3.50
    Sale Price: $2.45
    Be Yourself. Everybody Else Is Taken - Quotable Card
    "Be yourself. Everybody else is taken." ~ Oscar Wilde
    Reg. Price: $3.50
    Sale Price: $2.45
    Coffee First Schemes Later - Funny All Occasion Card
    "Coffee first. Schemes later." ~ Leanna Renee Hieber
    Reg. Price: $3.50
    Sale Price: $2.45
    There Is No Psychiatrist Like A Nuzzle - Funny All Occasion Card
    "There is no psychiatrist like a nuzzle."
    Reg. Price: $3.50
    Sale Price: $2.45

    There are many, many other funny cards in the Borealis Press collection.
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